If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
i black out too much to be "responsible"
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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