Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Help. Why am I so naked?
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