Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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