can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize