I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
