ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
