let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize