She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize
