yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
