Sponge bath it is.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
