I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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