Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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