You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
