oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
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I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
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