i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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