We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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