69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
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