Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
