your thong is hanging out like whoa
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
