He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
