is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize