Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
You're completely useless in the revolution.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
