You really coming over, don't trick.
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
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