i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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