im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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