that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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