The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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