Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Randomize
