....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
You took a bar mat shot.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
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