I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
