I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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