i don't like sucking hair
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
