if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
