I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize