Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.