Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He felt like a one man threesome
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
