I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
