she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
