whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize