yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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