I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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