girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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