yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize