He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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