so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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