I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
