I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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