people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
