so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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