So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
