Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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